The Ransome Brothers Page 17

  “Hang on just a second,” I say, my voice raising. “I do not hate that your brother is with Daisy.” At his incredulous look I shift. “It might have taken me a little time to come around to the idea—”

  Cash snorts.

  “But it’s obvious she’s really good for your brother.”

  From the look on his face, Cash clearly doesn’t believe me. “When did you figure that out?”

  “Maybe around the time Lennon had his accident.”

  Cash’s jaw snaps closed and I sigh. “Look, I always want to protect you boys. And yes, that does make it hard for me to open this circle to people I don’t know. But if Daisy hadn’t been there when Lennon was having such a hard time…” I close my eyes, remembering those days in the hospital, those endless hours when Lennon had refused to speak to any of us, to even let us in the room.

  “He talked to her,” Cash mutters, watching my face closely. “She was the first person he would see.”

  I nod, a lump in my throat. “I was so glad she was there,” I say. “And it’s the same for Paige and Sam—you think I can’t see how happy they make you guys? You think I don’t want that for you?”

  “I guess I didn’t…I guess I didn’t think you cared about that too much.”

  I feel his words like a punch to the gut. This is how they see me, all four of them. As a cold, unfeeling bastard, more manager than father. Someone who cares more about their careers than their feelings. And that’s on me.

  “Of course I’m happy that you’re with Sam, Cash,” I say, feeling very tired now. “And I don’t understand why you went on a bender because she got pregnant.”

  He slumps forward. “It’s not that I’m not…I don’t know. I’m not mad about it, or anything. I just…fuck.” He rubs his hands over his face. “I don’t think I can do this, Dad.”

  “Why on earth would you say that?”

  He glares up at me. “Look at me. I’m not supposed to be someone’s dad.”

  “Why not?”

  Cash is getting worked up, breathing faster, his cheeks darkening. “Because I’m an idiot. A screw-up.”

  “No you aren’t.”

  He laughs. “Did you forget about coming to get me last night? Have you forgotten about all the other crap I’ve pulled over the years?”

  “No,” I say evenly. “But I also haven’t forgotten how patient you are with Wyatt. How much you clearly love Rose. How loyal you are to your brothers and to Sam.” I shake my head. “That’s really all you need, buddy. Loyalty, love. A little patience.” I feel the corners of my mouth tugging up. “If the kid is anything like you, maybe a lot of patience.”

  Cash barks out a laugh, wiping at his eyes, and I know he’s trying not to cry.

  “Times like this,” I say softly, “I really wish your mom was here.”

  His head snaps up. “What?”

  I don’t blame him for his shock. I never talk about Rebecca. I sigh, gesturing between us. “She was better at this stuff. The emotional stuff. It was always hard for me.” I swallow. “Especially after she left. I know I didn’t do a good job teaching you boys how to…you know.” I make another vague gesture and then Cash is smiling, really smiling for the first time all morning.

  “How to what?”

  “Deal with your…you know…emotions.”

  He’s laughing now. “Oh my God, Dad, you can’t even say the word.”

  I grin back. “I know. I’m hopeless.”

  “No you aren’t,” he says softly, the smile fading. “You’re not hopeless, Dad.”

  There’s another lump in my throat. But it also feels, for the first time in a long time, like it might just be easier for me to breathe. “So what should we do now?” I ask. “If Lennon was here, he’d probably say we should hug it out.”

  Cash snorts. “Good thing he’s not here, then, huh?”

  I laugh, walking around the counter and grabbing his shoulders, pulling him up and wrapping my arms around him. “What the hell,” I mutter in his ear. “A hug isn’t gonna kill me.”

  It takes a few seconds for Cash to bring his arms up and I’d be lying if I said this isn’t a little uncomfortable. But I don’t care. I have a feeling it’s exactly what my son needs right now.

  “You’ll be able to do this,” I mutter, close to his ear.

  “You really think so?” Cash’s voice is like a dart through my chest, high-pitched and thin and so much younger than I’m used to hearing.

  “No doubt in my mind.”

  I tighten my arms, just for a second, letting myself feel grateful that my kid is here, actually talking to me. Hugging me. Then I release him, not wanting to press my luck.

  “Come on,” I say, pretending not to notice as Cash wipes his eyes. “Ruby was right—you need some food. Let’s go get breakfast.”

  His face lights up, his grin more than a little mischievous. Now that is an expression I’m familiar seeing on my second child. “Then are you gonna tell me about this hot bartender who spent the night?”

  I roll my eyes. “Don’t press your luck, buddy.”

  Reed

  8 Years Ago

  I’ve only been at the party for half an hour, and I’m already bored.

  “There are some hot girls here tonight,” Billy Cooper says, leering around the room over the top of his red plastic cup filled with crappy beer.

  “High school girls,” I tell him and his leer grows, making me feel more than a little creeped out.

  “And what’s the problem with high school girls?”

  I hide my sigh behind my own cup. I didn’t really want to come to this party tonight, figuring it would mostly be filled with kids who are younger. But a bunch of my coworkers at the body shop have been bugging me to come out with them, and I figured grabbing a beer at a stupid kegger was a good way to get them off my case. If I’d known three of them were going to camp out in the basement, smoking weed with the stoners and leaving me stuck with Billy, I wouldn’t have bothered.

  “Hey, it’s Reed, right?”

  I look up to see a vaguely familiar girl standing in front of me. She’s good looking, blonde and curvy. I also have the feeling she had only been a sophomore when I graduated high school last spring. The idea of flirting with a sixteen-year-old isn’t at all appealing. That puts her right around Lennon’s age, and that feels downright creepster.

  “Right,” I tell her, searching my mind for her name. It doesn’t come to me. “You go to Jonesboro High?”

  She nods, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear as she blinks up at me. “It’s Cassandra. Your brother Cash is in a few of my classes.”

  That makes me look at her with a bit more interest. If she’s in Cash’s class, that means she’s only a year younger than me. I still don’t love the idea of hooking up with a high schooler, but I have to admit that this girl is pretty hot.

  “Yeah,” she says, blinking some more, and I realize she must think it makes her look attractive or something. It really just makes it look like she has something in her eye. “He’s in my math class and my English class. Cash is pretty funny, isn’t he?”

  I bite back a groan. Cash is in a few remedial classes and I’m pretty sure English and math are two of them. So maybe this girl is a sophomore after all.

  “Are you talking about Cash Ransome?” another girl asks, stopping at Cassandra’s side.

  “Yeah,” she says, pointing at me. “This is his brother.”

  She raises her eyebrows at me. “Then I think your brother is currently kicking someone’s ass in the front yard.”

  “What?” I didn’t even know Cash was at this party. “He’s fighting?”

  The girl shrugs. “That’s what I just heard.”

  I turn to Billy. “I should go take care of this.” He nods, bringing his beer to his mouth as he looks at Cassandra. Since Billy is a good three years older than me, this definitely can’t fly. “Why don’t you walk with me,” I tell Cassandra, taking her arm. She gazes up at me with a half-open mouth, lo
oking like Christmas just came early. I get her into the living room before letting her go. “Sorry about that,” I say, giving her my most charming smile. “That guy can really be a creep. I didn’t want to leave you alone with him.”

  She releases a breathy sigh. “That is so sweet of you.”

  I give her another grin, just wanting to get the hell out of here now. “I wish I could stay and talk some more,” I lie. “But I should go check on my idiot brother.”

  She giggles like I’ve just said the funniest thing ever and I struggle not to roll my eyes. “Have a good night, Cassandra. Remember, stay away from the pervy old dudes.”

  “I will,” she says, still giggling, and I can feel her wide eyes on me as I walk from the room.

  There’s a small crowd gathered on the far side of the lawn and I sigh. Definitely looks like a fight. I make my way over in a few long strides, pushing people aside so I can see what’s going on. Sure enough, Cash is in the middle, his lip already bleeding, fists swinging.

  “All right,” I say, entering the fray. “That’s enough, Cash.”

  “Fuck you,” he growls, turning away from me and landing another punch. I grab his arm and he spins in my direction. “Back off, Reed!”

  I get in close to his face, knowing he’s probably going to hit me next, but there’s no help for it. I need to get him calmed down. “You’re in the front yard, asshole. Someone is going to call the cops, if they haven’t already. Knock it off.”

  He releases a choppy breath and I watch as he visibly struggles to calm down, his shoulders hunching before the tense lines of his face relax slightly. “Fine. But that guy had it coming.”

  “They always do,” I mutter, taking his arm again and pulling him from the group, ignoring the curses of the guy he was fighting. Once we’ve cleared most of the onlookers, I glance over at him. He’s still breathing heavily. “How’d you get to the party?”

  “Friend,” he snaps. “What are you even doing here?”

  “Stupid guys from work wanted to go out for a drink. We ended up here.” I pull my keys from my pocket. “Come on, I have the car down the street.”

  He follows me, not saying another word. Even in the dark I can see that he’s bleeding pretty good. I wait until we’re in the car. “What happened?”

  He shrugs. “That guy was an asshole.”

  “I take it you started it?” He glares at me but doesn’t contradict it. “You need to cool it, Cash.”

  “Oh, God,” he says, hunching in his seat. “I do not need a lecture right now, Reed.”

  “Maybe you do. We have a gig tomorrow, or did you forget?” I push a finger against his forehead, right above the cut. “What do you think Dad is going to say about this?”

  “I think he’ll be pissed at me. What else is new?”

  I try not to sigh, knowing it will only piss him off, and start the car. “There was a message on the machine from Hawkins,” I tell him and Cash groans loudly.

  “That guy hates me.”

  I nod. The science teacher had hated me, too. “That’s why he wants Dad to call? Because he hates you?”

  He hunches down a little in his seat. “I’m failing.”

  “Shit, Cash.”

  “The hell did I just say about the lecture, Reed?”

  I take my eyes off the road to glare at him. “You’re not going to graduate at this rate. Getting in fights all the time, failing classes. Come on, man. Get your shit together. You have one semester left and you’re out of there.”

  “What does it matter?” he asks, rubbing a hand across his lip. It comes away smeared with blood. “It’s not like I’m going to college or something.”

  “You don’t want to be a high school drop out. Give me a break.”

  “What do I need a diploma for? I just want to play guitar.”

  I’m starting to want to punch him myself. He can be such a whiney baby. “Guitars cost money,” I remind him. “So do amps and new drum skins and recording time and all the other stuff we need. You really want to be working at McDonald’s to pay for it?”

  He grumbles something under his breath and I decide lecture time is over. He’s either going to get it together or he won’t. I can’t do it for him.

  He’s quiet until we’re nearly home. “Sorry you had to leave the party,” he finally says.

  I snort. “It’s no sacrifice. Drinking warm piss-water beer and getting hit on by sophomores is not my idea of a good time.”

  “Sophomores, huh?” he asks, a smile tugging up the corners of his mouth. “Anyone interesting?”

  I take a hand off the wheel to punch his shoulder. “Don’t be gross.”

  He just laughs. “Doesn’t have to be a sophomore, Reed,” he says. “It could be an old lady for all I care. But you need to get laid. You are way too uptight.”

  “Fuck off.”

  I can see him smirking from the corner of my eye but I ignore it until we pull into the driveway. “Listen,” I say, turning to him. “We only have a few years left in this shithole. Daltrey turns eighteen and we’re out of here. You need to get focused, man. You don’t want to screw up and end up stuck here, right?”

  He doesn’t meet my eye. “Right.”

  I punch his shoulder again, lighter this time. “So lay off the fighting. And the girls—especially the sophomores because you’re too old and that’s pathetic. And try to turn in some homework once in a while.”

  “Maybe I could get Lennon to do it for me,” he says, smirking again.

  “Yeah, that’s not going to work. He’s way smarter than you—the teachers will totally know you cheated.”

  He punches me across the console and I punch him back. “Come on. I’m starving.”

  We go into the house, finding Lennon and Daltrey sitting at the kitchen table, cards spread out in front of them. “What’s up, youngsters?” Cash says, going right for the fridge.

  “What the hell happened to you?” Lennon asks, gaping at his face.

  “Ran into a door,” Cash mutters into the fridge.

  “You get in a fight?” Daltrey asks. “Was she a lot bigger than you or…?”

  I hold out my fist for him to bump. “That was a pretty good burn.” I look down at the cards. “What are you playing?”

  “War,” Lennon says. “I’m kicking his ass.”

  Cash comes over to the table, a piece of cold pizza hanging out of his mouth. “Kid’s game,” he mumbles around it.

  “Cash has a point,” I tell them, sliding into the chair across Len. “You wanna play poker?”

  “Don’t know how,” Daltrey says, trying to grab the pizza from Cash, who smacks his arm away.

  “We can teach you,” I say, looking up at Cash. “You in?”

  Cash lets out a sigh. “Yeah, I totally feel like spending my Friday night with a couple kids.”

  “You’re going to be spending your Saturday night with us too, genius,” Lennon says. “We have a gig tomorrow.”

  Daltrey groans. “Dad is totally going to make me play keyboard, I know it.”

  “You’re good at keyboard,” I tell him. “Better than any of us. Dad just wants us playing to our strengths.”

  Cash runs a hand over Daltrey’s head, messing up his hair. “We can’t all be cool enough to play guitar, little brother.”

  “Are you playing or not?” Lennon asks, shuffling the cards.

  I look up at Cash, meeting his gaze. “Weren’t we were just talking about spending more time being chill?”

  Cash groans. “There’s chill and then there’s lame, Reed.”

  “Right, Cash,” Daltrey says. “It’s much cooler to get your ass kicked at some lame kegger.”

  “Kid has a point.” I point at the empty chair. “Sit down. Your little brother just told us he doesn’t know how to play poker. That’s completely unacceptable.”

  Cash slides into the chair. “You’re right. We need to remedy this immediately. There’s no way I’m going on the road with you this summer if we can’t even pl
ay a round or two of poker on off nights.”

  I point to Lennon. “Deal the cards, little brother.”

  We play a couple hands before Dad comes home from work, Daltrey mostly getting the hang of it by then. Cash invites Dad to join us but he’s clearly exhausted and he strongly hints that we should all get some rest so we’re fresh for the gig tomorrow. His eyebrows go up when his gaze lingers on Cash’s cuts, but he doesn’t mention it.

  I say goodnight to the others before following Cash down to the basement. We used to share rooms but once Cash and I hit high school it got way too crowded so we helped Dad to jury-rig some rough walls to divide up the basement. It gets pretty cold down here in the winter, but at least we all get a little privacy this way.

  “That was good,” Cash mutters, pausing outside the door to his room. “Having a chill night, I mean.”

  I run my hands through my hair. “I know you like a little more excitement in your life, Cash. I just…” I look up to meet his eyes. “Remember what the goal is, you know?”

  He nods. “I’ll do better.”

  We both stand there for a minute, quiet, and I know he’s thinking about it too, the thing we’re working for. The thing we’ve been working for since we were kids. The thing we all want more than anything else on earth.

  “We should get in some practice in the morning,” Cash says, looking up at me, his eyes brighter than they were a minute ago.

  “Yeah,” I say, and I know he feels it too, that fire simmering in the chest. That burning desire to make this happen, to do whatever it takes to make Ransom the success we know it can be. I can see it in his eyes, and I know mine look the same when I meet his gaze. “Definitely. I’ll let Dalt and Len know.” We nod at each other. “Get some sleep.”

  “Night, Reed.”

  “Night, Cash.”

  Cash

  I’m pretty sure I’m going to throw up. Which is basically how I’ve been feeling every day, but it’s particularly bad now. I make the mistake of mentioning this to Sam. I’d never realized an expression could be sarcastic, but that’s exactly the vibe I get from her when she looks at me, even before she’s said a word.